Self-Evident Truths…or Please Come Rescue Me From My Laundry

Since I went back to work, life around my house has been a series of adjustments and restructuring, liberally sprinkled with a few mental breakdowns. While this whole transition has been smoother than I hoped, even my most manic optimism cannot combat some simple truths I am learning to accept.

  • There is no such thing as “caught up” on laundry. There is simple “behind,” “farther behind,” and “send in a backhoe-to-uncover-the-hamper behind.” If I happen to find a free second to spare, it’s not really free…because that damn laundry pile sits in the corner and mocks me.

  • No matter how early I go to bed, I will still feel like crying when the alarm goes off at 5:15. It must be some genetic encoding that science has yet to acknowledge.
  • My kids will complain about every dinner I make, and they could care less if I rushed home and cranked out a hot meal while still in heels. Apparently, I will only get my cool-mom points later, as they remember these years fondly….but for now, they are simply miffed they didn’t get a Happy Meal.

  • I owe my husband an apology for laughing when he suggested that the robotic vacuum would be a great gift for me a few years ago…now, I would give anything to have one less chore to do.
  • Even I didn’t realize how much I did as a SAHM. As little things like oil changes, license renewals and school meetings pop up, I am still baffled that I now have to take great effort to squeeze them into my schedule, instead of just getting them done…sometime this century.
  • There is a reason they call it “Crackberry.”
  • I am surprised my husband did not slap me upside me head on those days when I complained about being at home….he clearly has the patience of a saint.
  • I still have a long way to go before I can say that I’ve got this working mom thing down, but I’ve managed it for almost six months and that ain’t bad.

While these simple truths are just now sinking in, my husband and I are about to start on our next big adventure: moving! We have been painting, scrubbing, hauling and fixing, and we plan to put our house on the market at the end of the month. Stay tuned for what I am sure will be a hilarious tale of house selling/hunting/buying as we finally leave our starter home and head to town.

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