In 2025, I was on the struggle bus both physically and mentally, but there was one goal I set for myself: host more.
I’ve seen the statement on social media many times: “Everyone wants a village, but no one wants to be a villager.” I get it. People are overtaxed, overextended, and the economy is a dumpster fire. Life is just different.
But my mom ingrained in me the magic of hospitality, and that it’s a gift you give to those you love. I remember one time, after an all-night field party, I came home with four classmates with no notice (and we were hungover and hangry). Mom simply fixed everyone a plate and offered them cake for dessert. My friends were in awe and asked to come back next week. She instilled in me that there’s always room at the table and that a welcoming home can be a balm to the soul. As I was feeling low last year, I decided to take a page out of Mom’s book and create the space that would nurture both myself and those I love.
So, in 2025, we started Sunday-Funday. We invited a diverse group of friends and acquaintances, created a text thread, and committed to hosting a monthly get-together. What started as a smallish gathering has grown into an event. We may have 6 guests, or we may have 25, depending on the month. And through our efforts, we’ve gotten to know new people, solidified personal connections, and overall, have created a lasting community.
Here’s how we do it:
- First, we pick a theme so that I can plan a menu and cocktails. We’ve done Fiesta, Friendsgiving, “Appy” Hour, Italian Summer, Chili Kickoff, and more. I start with the main entree, then figure out the sides, desserts, and 2-4 appetizers for cocktail hour. Once the menu is set, I send it out to the group text.
- Next, unless it’s a special occasion like Friendsgiving, we keep it casual. Good paper plates and disposable utensils. People serve themselves and find a spot. This isn’t a formal dinner party, it’s Sunday-Funday. I still use my serving pieces and such, but the casual atmosphere helps the diverse crowd relax.
- A clean, well-stocked bathroom is my firm essential. Nearly every guest will use the restroom at some point, and a clean bathroom helps them feel comfortable, which is the root of hospitality. I may have thrown three loads of laundry on my bed to be folded later, but the common spaces of the house will be in order. Not perfect, just in order. Except the bathroom. That will be perfectly clean and stocked.
- The menu is also a time to exercise the hosting muscles. While I don’t cater to extensive preferences/diets, I try to ensure that every guest has something they can eat. For example, I know that one guest keeps somewhat Kosher, so I know that I need a couple of things that so not have pork or shellfish. I actually failed at this this week because a guest’s spouse is vegan, which I did not know, and other than crudité, there was nothing she would eat. I was so embarrassed, but now I know and have filed that away in my kitchen journal.
- Inevitably, a guest is going to ask, “What can I bring?” I’ve learned to have a list of a few things ready just in case because people truly want to contribute. An app, a dessert, ice, extra crackers, etc. all are easy and don’t require much. In the American South, most guests for casual gathers will ask this question, and I’ve learned to have an answer, even if it is just “yourself.”
- I take pictures when I can, but our gatherings are not about social media content. It’s about connecting and community. The entire point is to spend time with people and make them feel welcome. I will usually walk around and snap a few pictures but limit myself to 5-10 minutes for our group text but otherwise, I focus on remaining present.
- Drinks. We do our best to keep a well-stocked drink station, so people have plenty of options. Additionally, we keep bags of ice in the cooler because nothing ruins a party faster than running out of ice.
While Sunday-Funday is a monthly affair, I still try to incorporate small-scale hosting throughout the month, even if it is just inviting the neighbor over for dinner. It’s nice to unplug and connect with people over a good meal. I believe that taking the time to treat others is an incredible gift.
Mostly, I think that if you want a village, you sometimes have to just build it yourself. Happy Hosting!
